Standing still in time

Today was really strange.  As I was riding back from the movies, I started thinking about everything that has been happening to me.  I thought about my kids then felt peaceful.  I noticed the cross on a nearby church pass through the direct sun above then a dove flew over my car.  The next few minutes were very strange, like I have never experienced before.  I really can’t put it into words because there are no words in the English language to describe it.  If I had to explain it, I would say that as I was driving it was as if everything was standing still even though it was moving.  I was driving, but I really was not there.  It was as if everything stood still and all was quiet.  This continued even after I got out of the car, so I went out to the front porch to sort things out.  I sat down in the rocking chair to think, and then it was okay.  My next thoughts were, is this it?  Am I going to die today, this way?

My head sometimes has felt as if it were numb over my left ear.  When it happened before, I can’t remember where it was that was numb or how long ago this happened.  When I am in the car and the air conditioner is blowing the air near my ear, my ear feels sensitive to my hair touching it.  I am going to see a doctor next week, about a strange popping that I has been happening in the left part of my neck, as I reposition my head on my pillow at night. 

I will bombard him with all the other crazy things that have been happening to me, and I will ask for guidance as to where I should go from here.  I guess I should see a neurologist and maybe get a cat scan.  I would just like to know what is going on, and I may not get the answers I want right away, but hopefully I will. 

My neck has been real stiff today, my skin has been itching a lot in different places, and I seem to have a lot of gas lately.  Basically, I am falling apart.  Ashton is sitting next to me and wants to read what I am writing, and I told him he couldn’t.  He did not need to know what I was writing about .

If this disease is going to take my life, then I am going to be proactive and make sure the spiritual things I want to teach my kids will be accomplished.  Ashton was watching baseball on TV today and was speaking as if he wanted to be a professional baseball player.  I told him whatever he did he would have to do it as unto the Lord.  He noticed how one player threw his bat and helmet down, and he made a comment about it.  I told him a lot of young people were watching that player, and he needed to be an example.  I told Ashton even if other players were doing something wrong, he should not jump in.  I am also trying to be sensitive when the kids ask me if I can do something with them.  Last night, it was Ashton wanting to play UNO Attack while I was typing, so I stopped and played with him and tonight it was Lauren not being able to get to sleep.  I took my laptop onto my bed and typed in there as she lay down next to me.

U  How can you pour your life into your children/grandchildren?  U

U  Have you instilled Jesus in them?  U