A sense of hopelessness

For the last few days, I have had a sense of hopelessness.  To pep me up a little, I played back the videotapes of when I was on TV because the ornament I made got to President Bush.  I remember back to how God used me during that period of time, and how He got the ornament there despite my human efforts.  This was such a special time in my life.  But lately, well, things have just been hard.  I have for a while now just been tired of this rat race and just want to be with the Lord in Heaven.  I have been so ready for Him to return and take me home.  In a lot of ways, I am jealous of Mom being able to be in Heaven with Jesus, and I have to be here on earth.  Life is just full of tears and pain, and in Heaven I won’t have to deal with that anymore.

U  Are you living one day at a time or even a half day at the time?  U

Yesterday was Mother’s Day.  It was my first Mother’s Day without Mom.  It was hard.  I was grumpy towards my kids.  I wanted a quiet day and took a nap after church.  We took Evelyn and my father-in-law, Tom, out to dinner.  The kids were wired, and I just wanted a quiet evening.

 

U  Are you stating what you would like to do when the firsts occur?  Or can you ask your family member what they would like to do?  U

The devotion I read a few days ago just whopped me beside the head.  The prayer at the end stated, “Father, I thank you for the assurance that your plans never fail.  When everything around me seems hopeless, remind me of your plan for the Israelites in captivity in Egypt.  Help me to see things from your eternal perspective and to hold on to the reality that in spite of the way things look, you are in control.  Indeed, you are still on the throne!”

 

U  Are you willing to trust a God you have never seen?  U

Fuller, Cheri. The One Year Book of Praying through the Bible. Wheaton:  Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., 2003. May 6.