Tomorrow would have been
Mom’s birthday. I did not know what I
should do about Dad and whether I should send him a card. What would I say? I called Joann and talked to her. I decided to send him his favorite cookies
from my shop and had Paul send them to
him. When I checked my e-mail today, Dad
said thanks for the cookies, and on the same e-mail, he also wrote to Jennifer. Jennifer and Juliette made Dad
cookies and sent them to him also.
Tomorrow will be a hard day especially for Dad.
I think about what Dad
thinks of when he sees us. The one
thing, I thought he may think is that he made love to Mom for us to be
here. I also thought about Dad having to
face Mom everyday knowing she was dying and how hard that must have been for
him. It was hard enough seeing her the
times I was able to.
Along with an e-mail,
Dad sent us pictures of Mom’s and Brennan’s grave slabs. Just looking at the slab makes me think about
her and how at one time she breastfed us, loved us, and hugged us. Now she is buried in the ground. It is so hard looking at her picture. It is hard to believe she is not here
anymore.
On Mom’s birthday, I
took the kids to the pool. While sitting
outside, I thought of Mom and said out loud that I missed her and I said "Happy
Birthday." I even sang, “Happy Birthday”
out loud. Call me crazy!! Since I did not know if she could hear me, I
thought it was appropriate to do so. I
never thought about Heaven and whether birthdays are celebrated. I know Jesus knows the exact day and second
we were born.
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