The Royal wedding (part II)

 

The reception was held at Claudia’s friend’s house.  Her friend was actually the one that introduced Dad and Claudia.  One of Mom and Dad’s friends made a comment about how pretty my hair was and then said, “Your mom would have liked it.”  Granddaddy came down to St. Simons for the wedding and when asked what he thought about the wedding he said, “It was beautiful.”

They paid people to sing and play music.  Dad and Claudia were shagging, so I took pictures.  They were as giddy as could be.  Lauren and Ashton entertained themselves on the beach playing in the sand. 

I wanted to repay Dad for all the birdseed he enjoyed throwing on all his girls as they got married.  This time it was my turn!  I asked my sisters if they bought any birdseed, and they had not.  I sent Paul to the grocery store to buy some.  I got a lot of cups, filled them up, and then rallied the troops, so everyone could add in on the fun.  We hid the cups and persuaded Dad and Claudia to walk past us because we had to “take pictures.”  Then the birdseed started flying.  Dad had it everywhere.  He just stood there with his neck tucked in like a turtle, and his arms folded out in front of him.  I poured it in his pockets and everywhere.  I had the rest of the bag, and there was a little left.  Claudia started walking near me, and I poured the last bit in her hair and told her, “Welcome to the family!”  I decided earlier to go easy on Claudia, but at the end changed my mind!  They then headed off for a week long cruise.

During the reception, they had Beta fish swimming in goblets to decorate the tables.  Dad wanted each of the four girls, Kelli, and Adam to take the fish home.  At first, I said I did not want one then thought it would be neat for the kids to have a fish from Dad’s wedding.  They had wanted a fish for a long time, so I changed my mind.  They called him Sparkles.

The Royal wedding (part I)

 

Saturday morning, we went early to the chapel to take pictures.  Joann helped fix my hair and made it real curly.  Lauren, Ashton, and I each wore something of Mom’s.  I had on her wedding band: Lauren wore one of Mom’s charms on a necklace, and Ashton put a silver cross in his pocket that Mom gave him.

U  Can you remember your deceased loved one by wearing a small trinket of theirs during the wedding?  U

The wedding was set to start at 11:00 a.m.  Claudia did not want Dad to see her until she walked down the aisle.

As the four girls, Dad, and Jim waited to come in the front of the church, we were cutting up and laughing.  I had hoped no one heard us.  The girls stood by Dad in birth order which was also by height as well.  Joann stood between Dad and me.  Jennifer and Jamie were behind me.  During the ceremony, Jim said something that made me want to cry, but I cannot remember what he said.  I bit the inside of my cheek to help me not cry.  Jamie held Claudia’s wedding band, and when Jim asked for the ring, we each passed it to one another, then to Jim.  What a neat idea!  It was as if each one of us were blessing the marriage.  When Jim asked for Dad’s wedding ring, Adam passed it to Kelli, and she gave it to Jim.

While Dad was saying his vows he got choked up.  He was supposed to be the strong one for Claudia.  The ceremony was beautiful.  I peeked around Joann, so I could see what was going on.  I asked Jennifer if she wanted to see and she said, “Yes.”  I moved out of the way, so she could see too.  Then, just that quickly, the wedding was over.

Preparing for the Royal wedding (part III)

Friday afternoon, we enjoyed going to the beach with Dad.  Later, I went over to Grandmother’s house to get her wedding gift.  She had not written in the card yet.  I sat on her bed and waited for her to write.  She sat there contemplating what to write and said, “I can’t think.”  She told me she knew what she wanted to write the night before.

On a piece of paper, she scribbled down a few things then stopped to think again.  She did this several times.  She pondered how to sign the card and asked me what I thought Claudia would call her.  It took her about ten minutes to find the right thing to say.  I never really thought about her wanting to say just the right thing to Dad.      

U  Are you realizing everyone is going through a transition?  U

 

Friday night we had the rehearsal at the chapel.  We met Adam, Kelli, Claudia’s mom, and other relatives.  Claudia got teary eyed when Dad was going over the vows. 

The rehearsal dinner was given by some of Claudia’s family.  The invitation was real cute.  At the top there was a picture of a king’s and queen’s crown, and it stated there was a Royal wedding.
 

Dad did not want the grandkids to be at the rehearsal dinner.  Megan is fourteen and Juliette, the youngest will be five this month.  I can understand how Dad wanted to enjoy a quiet evening with his friends and family.  So there would not be any bias, all the grandkids did not come.

U  Are you accepting your loved one is making decisions for their benefit even if you may not agree?  U

When we first got to the dinner, the sun was setting over the ocean, and we got several nice pictures of Dad and Claudia.  We also got several pictures of all the girls together as well as each sister with their spouse.

The rehearsal dinner was nice, and I spent time talking with the guests.  We wore a Burger King crown on our heads to represent it being a Royal wedding.  I talked with one of Claudia’s friends, and she told me it meant a lot to Claudia that we told her to decorate the house how she wanted to.

U  Are you seeing how this new loved one needs to start afresh and new concerning how things need to be?  U

Claudia gave the girls a wedding gift that night from her and Dad.  It was all too appropriate.  The gift was a beautiful angel ornament which had this quote written on it, “God has no other hands than ours.” (Dorothee Soulle, n.d.)

That night as I lay in bed, I thought about the wedding and wanted for there to be a balance.  For me to be excited about the wedding, but I did not want to forget about Mom.  I started crying.  During the night, I awoke and realized I had fallen asleep crying.

Preparing for the Royal wedding (part II)

I sent Dad an email and told him to keep a low key and let things fly off the cuff.  I knew the next two weeks before the wedding would be stressful for Claudia.  I also talked with him on the phone the week before the wedding and told him to be the calm in the storm.  He assured me he was being the calm in the storm.

A few days before the wedding, I was sitting on the front porch thinking about Mom.  I stood up and rang the chimes because the chimes remind me of her.  As soon as I rang the chimes, I looked up and saw a deer standing in the cul-de-sac.  The deer heard me ring the chimes and stared at me.  I told Lauren later and she said, “That’s like Granny because a deer is gentle, calm, and sweet.”  Leave it to a twelve year old to explain the truths in God’s nature. 

Lauren and Ashton were excited about the wedding.  One day, Ashton went around the house saying, “We’re going to Granddaddy’s wedding.  We’re going to Granddaddy’s wedding.”  I was excited about the wedding also and about Dad and Claudia getting married.  I did not know what my thoughts would be the day of the wedding.  I did not want to forget about Mom.  Could I focus on the wedding and not be in sorrow about her?

Thursday night, we arrived at Dad’s house around eleven at night.  Claudia wanted me to be there when I got to Dad’s house, so she could see my facial expressions when I saw the house for the first time.  I was the last of the girls to see the house.

I soaked each room in one at a time.  It did not even look like the same house.  Everything was crisp and new.  Of course Claudia had everything decked to a tee.  The house looked fantastic.

That night we gave them one of their wedding gifts.  I brought two kinds of Dad’s favorite cookies from my shop, and I brought Claudia’s favorite too.  I put the cookies in a cute white tin with a plastic lid, so they could take it on their honeymoon.  We also gave her a golden metal basket to put her keys in, so she would not lose them.

I made them a wedding themed bouquet of cookies.  I decorated a cookie that looks like a groom in his tux, a bride in her gown, a wedding cake, a wedding bell, one with “J” for Jim on it and another bell with “C” for Claudia.  I wanted to give the groom grey hair since Dad has grey hair but decided to be nice.   It was precious.

Evelyn had a doll in her garage sell that turns in circles and plays, “Here comes the bride.”  We gave it to them as a joke.  The four girls also gave them a gift card to Home Depot, so they could get a new grill.  The grill is desperately needed.  The last time I used Dad’s grill, it had major problems.

Preparing for the Royal wedding (part I)

The typical preparations were made as with any wedding.  This wedding though is a Royal wedding because Dad’s last name is Royal.  Claudia and Dad decided to have all of their children in the wedding.  At the front of the church beside Dad will be Joann, myself, Jennifer, and Jamie.  Next to Claudia will be her children Adam, and Kelli.  There was not going to be a best man or a maid of honor.  Just both of their families supporting them and standing beside them at the altar.

Claudia wanted us to have the color raspberry in our dresses.  We could mix and match our dress tops and skirts.  Everyone picked their favorite from the bridal shop, and it turned out no one had the same outfit.  Claudia picked out the shoes, and we were going to wear our pearl necklaces Grandmother started for us when we were young.  Grandmother would add pearls to the necklace for each of our birthdays.

I talked with Aunt Julie on the phone.  She told me Nana would not be attending the wedding.  Nana would find it difficult to be in the church where Mom had been and because she had been to church with Mom.  It would be depressing for her to see them, and it would be hard without Mom being there.

Nana called Dad and told him it was not any rejection on her part and explained the situation to him.  Julie also told me when Nana’s first husband died (Mom’s daddy), his mom and his grandmother did not want to come over to her house.  Julie told me it bothered Nana because they did not want to come over anymore.  Now Nana knows how it feels because it is too hard for her right now to come to Mom’s church to see Dad and Claudia get married.

U Are you aware there may be loved ones that will not be able to attend the wedding because it is too painful for them to go through?  U

Waiting for the Lord

 

The last twenty-four hours again have been a roller coaster ride for me.  Yesterday was an all-time low.  I received a rejection letter for this book which was hard for me to take because the editor suggested I take a writing course at a local college.  I cried and doubted the publishing of my book.  I wanted to print out my book, so I could remember the affirmation I felt the Lord gave me.  All I wanted to do was just go to bed.  I viewed this as Satan trying to discourage me.

I had emailed my sisters a few days earlier, telling them to pray for my book.  Today, when I was checking my emails, I read an email forwarded to me by Joann.  The title is, Waiting for the Lord. and was written by Os Hillman.  The scripture is, “Wait on the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait on the Lord,” Psalm 27:14

Os talked about hearing and doing God’s will and how they were two very different things.  He felt the Lord had called him to write which was very different than what he currently was doing.  He tried to find a publisher without any success.  His wife asked him if he had finished the book and he had not.  She basically told him when he finished the book, the Lord would provide a publisher if he was called to write.  Long story short, the day he finished the book, he was offered a contract for it to be published.

This of course is exactly what I needed to hear and of course it was the millionth confirmation God has given me.  He never ceases to amaze me.  He knew I was getting discouraged and very much wanted to follow His will.

As I was debating whether or not to write this in my book, I heard the chimes dinging on my front porch.

**I found a copy of the devotion if you would like to read it:  http://www.injesus.com/message-archives/prophetic/Word-Of-The-Lord-Today/waiting-for-the-lord

     Hillman, Os.  “Waiting for the Lord.” Today God Is First, Daily Workplace Inspiration.2005. http://www.TodayGodIsFirst.com

A rainbow in the sky (part II)

 

Sunday, we took up almost a whole row in church.  Claudia, Dad, Lauren, Ashton, Jennifer, James, Juliette, Jamie, Chris, Kaitlin, and I were there.  It was the Sunday before the fourth of July.  The choir was singing patriotic music.  I noticed Claudia was crying, and I assumed it was because of the words to the music.  Ashton was sitting between Claudia and me, so I put my arm around Ashton and patted her on the back.  Later, I asked Dad why she was crying.  He said it was probably the words to the song at the beginning of church because they are going to have that song sung in their wedding.  He told me she was a very emotional person. 

We went over to Claudia’s pool at her condo.  Before we went back to Dad’s house, we were standing in the parking lot, and she brought up the conversation about why she was crying in church.  She mentioned about the song being sung in their wedding.  She then said she looked down the row in church at all of us and thought, “I don’t deserve to be so blessed.”  I hugged her and told her we were blessed and everything will be all right.  Before I left to go back home, I hugged Dad and Claudia goodbye.  As I hugged Claudia, she said, “I love you.”  I replied, “I love you.” 

I talked with her today to make sure it was okay that I write about these things.  I told her it would just put an exclamation point on the book.  She told me I could write whatever I wanted to.  She said she did love all the girls and our kids.  She talked about Mom and how Mom and Dad raised us, and she said, “How it was a tribute to your mother.”  Everything to her was just a confirmation.  I guess everything is right, and it is God’s will.  But we are the ones who are blessed.  Dad could not have done any better!!

Dad approached me and told me he wanted to get a set of chimes to put at Mom’s gravesite.  I had been sporadically looking, and the other night I found just the right set.  On the chimes I bought, there was a beautiful angel playing the trumpet.  It was perfect!  I wanted to see if my sisters wanted to help pay for the chimes and suggested to them the chimes could be a “birthday present” for Mom, since her birthday was August 28^th.  I told them I could take the chimes to the gravesite when Dad got married.  I have a shepherd’s staff I will put the chimes on.   Everyone is going to chip in and pay for the chimes.  Ashton wanted to spend four dollars of his money to help pay for the chimes.

**The photos of the rainbows were taken when I was on a cruise not the night I wrote this posts.  It blessed me to see it.  The photo from today shows you how big it was.  It was the biggest rainbow I have ever seen!

A rainbow in the sky (part I)

 

I have a few thoughts I wanted to write down, and I could not think of a title for what I had to say.  Tonight, I was sitting on my front porch and noticed the sun setting on the trees.  The sun seemed to be setting in a different place, so I got up to check it out.  I walked out of my driveway and looked in the sky all around my house.  How fitting that I saw a beautiful, tall, rainbow in the sky with a partial, double rainbow next to it.  I went inside to tell Lauren and Ashton.  Lauren wanted me to get the video camera, so I did.  As I gazed in the sky, I said, “God keeps His promises.”  He has kept His promises from the very beginning of time, and in His word He said He would never leave us nor forsake us.  He was with Mom and my family every step of the way.

Grandma Freddie passed away a few weeks ago, and we went to her funeral.  It was a graveside funeral.  During the funeral, I heard wind chimes from another gravesite.  The chimes reminded me of Mom.  After the service, Dad came up to me and started to speak but couldn’t because he was choked up.  He said something about the chimes and Mom.  He said, “Your mom was here.”  I told him I was thinking the same thing.

After the service, a lady came up to me and said, “You look exactly like your mother.”  “You are so beautiful.”  She said my hair was like Mom’s too.  I was taken back by her comments and had to gather myself before I said, “Thank you.”  She told me she was a high school friend of Moms. 

After the funeral, Lauren, Ashton, and I went back to St. Simons to visit Dad for a week.  I helped Dad clean out a lot of things he needed to get rid of such as clothes, ties, and shoes that were out of style.  Mom kept a closet full of baby toys and toys for the grandkids.  She spoiled them to death!!  I got rid of a lot of the toys and made room for Dad’s things because that closet would be his.  Claudia would put her stuff in the other closet.

I reflected for a while when I was in the room where Mom died.  The phases replayed, the motions and emotions revisited.  I lay down in the position Mom was laying when she died and thought about the gates of Heaven opening up, and the angels escorting Mom to Heaven.  What a thought!  Ashton and I both took turns sleeping with Mom’s stuffed bunny.

As we were cleaning out stuff around the house, we came across an angel bear.  Ashton said he had given the bear to Granny.  Jennifer told Ashton since he had given the bear to her, he should keep it.  He was thrilled.  He told me, “Sleeping with the bear reminds me of sleeping with Granny.”  Mom would usually lay down with them at night, and she would usually fall asleep.