Get ‘er done (part I)

Dad sent the four girls an email tonight telling us he got his results back from the biopsy of his prostate.  One out of the nine samples came back positive.  On a scale of one to ten, his was a seven.  “For those not familiar with diagnostic methods, when a man is diagnosed with prostate cancer a needle biopsy procedure can often indicate how fast-growing the cancer is.  This rate of growth is given a number between 1 and 10 and is referred to as the ‘Gleason’ score or the ‘Gleason scale rating.’  1 on the Gleason scale indicates the slowest-growing type of prostate cancer and 10 indicates the fastest-growing type.  Typical prostate cancer Gleason ratings might be 3, 4, or 5.  Ratings of 7, 8, 9 or 10 are considered aggressive.”  He said he was getting a bone scan and CT scan Friday.  He mentioned it looks like surgery or some sort of radiation treatment.

First of all, I was trying to process the news and what exactly it meant before I talked to Dad.  I researched “prostate” and immediately it hit me, this was cancer.  Then my next thought was “survival rate.”  After I thought I had enough information, I called Dad.

I debated on whether or not to email him back or call.  I knew Dad did not like to open up and talk, but I thought emailing him back was so impersonal, especially concerning the topic.  I prayed before I called him because I did not want to say the wrong thing.  One of the biggest things I think I have learned though everything I have been though is the impact of words.  Words can encourage or destroy someone in a flash.  Most of the time, hurt feelings occur when the words are not thought about before they are spoken.  They are just blurted out without much preparation or thought of how the person receiving those words will hear them.  But, once said they cannot be taken back.  

I asked Dad a few questions.  He said he was going to deal with what he was dealt, and he would know the results on Monday.  As we talked, I did not want for there to be silence on my part.  I did not really know what to say.  Should I say, “I am praying for you?”  To me, that would show the need for urgency to pray at this particular point.

A billion things have run through my head tonight.  I thought about my kids, and how I don’t want them to know yet.  It is way too early, and there is still so much to find out.  I thought about Claudia.  I thought about me.  These last six years have been so extremely hard on me, and it is not going to get any better.  I take comfort in knowing God is still in control, and I have so much more to learn.

       U  Have you taken the time to pray before you speak about sensitive issues? U

U  Should you call or reply back to an email concerning someone’s prognosis? U

 

“What Men Need To Know about Prostate Cancer and PSA.” www.outsmartyourcancer.com/pdf/ProstateArticleForSite.pdf